Happy New Year, all.

It was only recently that I noticed how much I've changed over the last year. 2009 has been awesome to me... nothing super messed up has happened, no one died, I haven't gotten abducted by aliens, and none of my exes want to kill me. I made no enemies, only friends. And on top of all that, I made my arrival in high school and have survived four months generally unscathed. I think I'd call that a successful year.

But anyway, that's not what I wanted to talk about. What I wanted to do was compare myself now to myself at the beginning of this year. So...

Then:
- Eww, color. Black. <3
- I wanna learn piano omg. <3
- Hair all one color, or a fail with semi-permanent
- No makeup, all natural.
- Jewelry is for noobs.
- Accessories consist of studded bracelets only.
- Converse rip-offs from Airwalk
- Judgmental and critical of ALL THINGS.
- All my writing is structured and is never posted until I'm 100% happy with it.

Now:
- Still mostly into black, but loving other colors, specifically purple and green. <3
- Omg acoustic guitar. <3
- Awesome two-tone blond and copper red hair. Hell yeah.
- Makeup is good in moderation.
- Love jewelry, especially necklaces.
- Bandannas, scarves, hats and gloves please! (still loving studs though.)
- Two pairs of Converse; one from Toronto and one from Mexico. <3
- More laid back, it's all good man. :]
- More free writing and less structure is good.

I am very satisfied with the changes I have made. Life is going well for me as of now, and 2010 is looking good too. Christmas is only a few days away, I'm at the beginning of a steady relationship, my family is all intact and I can't think of how things could be a whole lot better. Time to embrace the new year with open minds and hope for the best. This will be my last entry of this year.

It's been a good one, guys.
2010, here I come!

Yours truly,

- Lexi

Music: Misery Business by Paramore

Need pipe cleaners, creating DNA, BRB.

So I just thought up a rant, guys, and I had to put it down.

I might as well explain the title of this entry first... it's another enchanting tale from my ninth grade science class. Last week, we were assigned a project where we had to make a model of a DNA strand. So I sent a text to my mom this morning asking her to get me some pipe cleaners so I could make the model. I know that now that I explain it all, it doesn't seem that funny, but I kinda thought it was.Yeah, I'm lame.

So today, I was looking in the new Sears catalog. Yes, there's already a new one... it's the Spring and Summer 2010 one now. It's the middle of December. WTF, guys? Aren't you kinda jumping the gun? I walked home in weather that was -19C today, with wind chill. I'm pretty sure it's still winter, guys. Sorry.

But that's not even it. I mean, I was just flipping through the first section of it, which is woman's fashion. You know how in the pictures, the models will be wearing a shirt in one color, but you can get in in several different ones? Well, the color is usually just put right beside the picture there, and I just saw some fat woman wearing a brown shirt. The color beside it said it was "light fudge."

That's a HORRIBLE name for a color. And I mean, putting a word like "fudge" in the color would make it sound appealing. But no, it's kind of an ugly brown to be honest. I think they just should have called it "shit brown." So yeah, that little top thing would come in bright red, cerulean, and shit brown. I know I'd buy it. And also, this fat woman is wearing a fudge colored shirt. Maybe it's we are what we eat, or something? I don't know. I just don't think that was a coincidence, man.

Okay, I think I'm done.

Yours truly,

- Lexi

Music: All Black by Good Charlotte

I'm allergic to flower sperm.

Did you know that pollen is flower sperm?
Yeah, I didn't know that until yesterday. Never stop learning, right?
God, my science class is so enlightening.

In other news, I broke up with Derrick this morning. Yeah, really. At first I wasn't sure I made the right choice, but I feel better about it now. It was probably because he said some very hurtful things... but he took it back eventually. We're not on a talking basis until he gets over me... which is fine, really. But I still feel down about the whole thing...

Sorry there's not much else I can say. I'm feeling awfully blue right now. Not in the bloggy mood.

Yours truly,

- Lexi

Music: When You're Gone by Avril Lavigne

Today, I learned how to properly draw a blob.

...and by blob, I mean cell.

In science today, we were looking through microscopes at vegetable and animal cells and drawing pictures of them in division... I'm not actually sure if that's what they're called in English, I have all my science classes in French. That was well planned out, really. It's like they're just trying to make university harder for all of us in the immersion program. Thanks, guys. Also, in case you forgot, the official languages of both math and science are, internationally, English. FAIL.

Anyway, the school's Christmas formal is tomorrow night. I'm a little excited, I'll be honest. IUt's kind of a shame Derrick can't come with me, but I guess it's alright. He's not so into the dances thing anyway. I don't think he would have had fun... but I will, tomorrow night. I know I'm dateless... and that's kinda lame seeing as I have a boyfriend, but oh well. I am gonna be looking alright though. Hehe. I love dances. I love the fast atmosphere, and I love dancing. It's almost like a high for me or something, I don't know... Reminds me of that saying, "high on life." I think I'd like to be high on life more often. Then maybe it wouldn't suck so much sometimes.

Well I guess that's all that mattered to me this Tuesday evening. I'll stop now.

Yours truly,

- Lexi

Music: Beautiful by Eminem (thanks Brett.)

You're my Wonderwall <3

On December second, 2008, I asked Derrick to be my lover.
He accepted.

Today, December second, 2009, I am proud to say I have been in a healthy, happy relationship with Derrick for the past year, despite all the obstacles we've had to face, the distance being the main one. I hope to see many more anniversaries with him. I'm so proud of us. :]

I love you so much Derrick. Happy anniversary! <3

Yours truly,

- Lexi

Music: Wonderwall by Oasis (that's our song <3)

Haven`t you heard, baby? I put the "hot" in "psychotic."

Greetings, Internet.

I come bearing good news. Derrick and I are still together, and the last two days have been better. I think we're gonna make it after all. Things are still super rough between us right now, and I have a feeling that they will be that way for a while. But we can push through it. I know we can. We always have before.

I love you, Derrick. Don't you ever forget it.

In other news, I went to see The Twilight Saga: New Moon with Kelsey, my moviegoer buddy, today. It was actually really good. I mean, I bashed the hell out of the first Twilight movie, and really, it wasn't that good. But this one was. I mean, I really wish I could say that I didn't like it and be all non-conformist and all that... but I can't really find anything specific to point out in it. Some of the special effects weren't top notch, but the CGI for the werewolves was really awesome. I also got to see Taylor Lautner shirtless, which was a huge plus. Kelsey was completely googly-eyed over him, which I think is hilarious. I won`t lie to any of you; he is HOT. In Kelsey's wise words: "I'd tap that all night long."

I am totally on Team Jacob, guys. No matter what ends up happening with Bella and Edfag.

Yours truly,

- Lexi

Music: When the Lights Are Down - Kamelot

Some quick facts...

Here we go.

1. It is currently 12:01AM where I am right now and I should be in bed long ago.

2. My lover is taking a painfully long time to decide if he wants to stay my lover or not.

3. He's done this to me three nights in a row now, this being the third.

4. The skin under my eyes actually hurts from crying so much. Literally. My face is sore.

5. Fuck me, I have no idea what to do.

(I know you've got nothing to work with here, but I'll fill you in later.)

6. I'm so tired it's not even funny.


Yours regrettably,

- Alex
(because he never called me Lexi. Just Alex.)

Music: None. That's a first.

It won't help me but I have to ask, is there something real that's behind the mask?

So.
I got banned from Facebook. Yeah. I just went to go check my Honest Box messages on Saturday night, and it wouldn't let me into my account. I thought it was just a bug, and it would resolve itself by morning... the new layout had everything all messed anyway. Well, I tried the next day, and no dice. And now, it's been more than 72 hours. It's not gonna resolve itself.

Now, I know what you're all thinking. You're all thinking, 'oh, she offended someone.' Or 'oh, she had naked pictures on her profile.' Or 'oh, she's a Nazi.' No. I promise all of those things are not true... except perhaps the first one, but if it is true, I really didn't mean it, guys. Sorry.

The only reason I got banned, that I can think of, must have something to do with my big Facebook group I had made. It was called "Gay" is not a synonym for "stupid." I asked Derrick to check his Facebook, to see if my group was still there. It's gone. And then it hit me: the other admin! He's my cousin, and he was the other administrator of the group. I think that if I had been banned and it wasn't for the group, he would have just been the only admin. Derrick pout in his name... he no longer exists on Facebook.

What?

I don't think I had done anything wrong. It must have been because I had banned someone from the group ( There were many - you wouldn't believe some of the ignorance I saw on that group. It was just ridiculous) and they complained of harrassment or something crazy like that. Ugh.

Anyway, I've kind of been mourning the loss of my Facebook account... and I never really noticed until now, but I use it a LOT. I mean, more than I thought I did for sure. It just goes to show how over-stimulated my generation is. Many of my peers constantly need to have something going on, or they just get bored. I can be like that too, but generally I am easily amused. I always thought that was a good quality.

I'll stop ranting now, sorry guys. I don't even know where I'm going with this.

Yours truly,

- Lexi

Music: Lungs Like Gallows by Senses Fail

Calling all cars, we've got another victim; cause my love has become an affliction... <3

Pineapple!
I mean, sorry! My saying I'd update more often has not been too fruitful. I apologize for my lack of entries. Not that anyone cares, because no one reads this blog. Oh well. :]

I'm in a good mood right now, blog. This is because I get to see Derrick in just a few hours. It's 5:25 now, and his bus gets here around 8. I haven't seen him for what feels like forever... even though it's only been three months. Heh. It's a good thing I really like that guy. :P

Random thought here.I realized something today. You know the phrase LMAO, as in "laughing my ass off"? When you say it, it pronounces like "el em ay oh", right? Well if you say it fast, to me, it sounds like "elle aime mayo", which is french for "she likes mayonaise". I don't know, just something I thought I should share that moment of pointless thought with you guys.
LMAO = she likes mayonaise.

Damn, there was one other thing I was supposed to write in here but I don't remember what it was. Oh well.

Yours truly,

- Lexi

Music: The City Sleeps In Flames - Scary Kids Scaring Kids

So give me reason to prove me wrong, to wash this memory clean...

Ohai.

Well, last night I talked to Derrick for a very long time... and we figured some stuff out. Now, I think we're gonna be happier than we have been with each other in a long time. He's going to try to stop being so in-my-face and worrisome, and I'm going to try and stop being so moody and bipolar about everything. Things will get better, I'm confident of it. IloveyouDerrick.<3

In OTHER news, life here is very average as of late. Thomas and Derrick are hopefully going to be here this weekend to visit, but other than that I have no plans for the next week. But I guess I could tell you about school today.

Some chick who's in a co-op class at my high school came to do a survey in our class on behalf of T&T, the local newspaper. It was a fashion related survey, and it was kinda fun to do. Me, my friend Brooke, and this Connor kid all did it today during BB Tech. It's gonna appear in the Whatever (teenage) section of the newspaper this Saturday, so that's kinda cool. It also prompted me to, after chicky from the paper left, rant to anyone who'd listen about how you should never EVER work for T&T delivering newspapers. Why? Cause it sucks, that's why. I'm gonna stop now, or I'll just go on and on forever about those damned newspapers...

Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: So Far by ChapterFour (Myspace link'd.)

Dear blog: Elections suck.

Yeah. The elections were today.

I presented my speech, and so did the other three candidates. I did okay. Noah did well. Connor did amazingly. And Andrew made himself look like an ass hole. But guess who won? I'll give you a hint. It wasn't me. It wasn't Noah. And, it wasn't Connor either. Yay! Ass hole for grade rep! He's pompous and full of himself... and practically ran as a joke and a publicity stunt. He's going to make a horrible grade rep. And guess what, ninth grade? You have no one to blame but yourselves.

Short entry, I know. But I don't feel great and I'm kinda pissed off. Sorry guys.

Music: The Stone - ASHES dIVIDE (it's spelled that way, I swear.)

Vote fer Lexi!

Hey there.

Guess what? Well, you can't really guess I suppose, so I'll just tell you. The meeting for the candidates interested in becoming a grade representative was held today! I went, because I wanna run for my grade nine rep. The meeting was kind of long, but I got through it. I learned that being a rep would be a lot more work than I previously thought. I'm still going to run though, so I'd better work on my speech.

I was GOING to explain all the work behind running for student government, but I'd rather talk about a current project of mine. I'm trying to learn Clint Massel's Requiem for a Dream on piano, and it's proving very difficult. I want to learn mainly because I love the piece, but also because my boyfriend loves it too. I want to play it for him next time he visits as a surprise... he doesn't know yet that I'm learning it. It really is a beautiful piece, and there are several versions of it... one that was used for a trailer of The Lord of the Rings: The Twin Towers. It is truly epic.

Yours truly,

- Lexi

Music: Requiem for a Dream (piano) - Clint Massel (link'd.)

I'm not dead! (sorry, everyone.)

Sorry to anyone who reads this! (that's probably no one, but oh well.) I've been so busy the last few weeks of summer, enjoying my last time with Derrick... and then saying goodbye to him, and starting high school.
Oh yeah, that's right. I started high school. Hellz yeah I'm a teenager!

Classes at my high school are very ordinary, and the people who attend those classes are very ordinary, and the teachers that teach the classes are very ordinary. It really is a very ordinary place... but that's fine with me. I kind of like ordinary these days. I know they say "routine is the hallmark of a small mind", but I've been praying for something simple and normal, something constant for what seems like forever now. I'm glad for things being the way they are now. I'm going to enjoy it while I can, before some other event happens and I'm all fucked over again.

Okay, enough about stupid high school. The other night, I went to see Silverstein, Ten Second Epic, Kingdoms, and I Am Committing A Sin in concert! it was an AMAZING show. Silverstein played one of my favorite songs of all time (My Heroine) and Kelsey got it all on video. On top of that, I got my picture taken with the lead singer, Shane Told! It was a real fangirl moment. I was just beaming.

I guess that's everything relevant going on in my life lately... This was more so an update to let everyone out there in blogger-land know that I'm still alive! I'll make sure to update more often.

Yours truly,
- Lexi
Music: My Heroine by Silverstein.

These boots weren't made for walking!

Good day!

Yesterday, I went to my first horseback riding lesson in four years. Four years... I hadn't realized it before, but it's really been that long since I was on a horse. Being at the barn with Larry, and even seeing Dusty the old dog... it was all so nostalgic, and wonderful.

My sister, mother and I all went in the morning towards 9:30 for the lesson at 10. We stopped at Tim's and got coffee etc. for everyone... and off we went. As soon as we pulled in the long driveway, Dusty started barking and running like there was no tomorrow. He ran up and greeted the van, then trotted along beside us until we parked. Jillian had her lesson with Larry first, and I enjoyed my cafe mocha... then, it was my turn. Wearing my red grad hoodie and Katie's old riding boots, I was about to really ride for the first time in four years.

I hadn't expected to be so excited, but I really was. I got on and off the horse all by myself, something I couldn't do before. I rode completely by myself. I had control... something I always lacked before, simply because at ten years old, I didn't have enough strength to properly tell the animal what I wanted him to do. Speaking of the animal, his name is Sullivan (or Sully). He's my cousin Katie's horse, and he's staying with Larry (a big name in all things equestrian around here) for training and such. He's a big chestnut gelding, he'll be 11 years old next Saint Patty's day.

Needless to really point out further, the lesson was amazing. Everything seemed perfect. It wasn't too warm or too cold outside, with a clear blue sky and a pleasant light breeze. i honestly couldn't have pictured it going any better than it did. Jillian was just beaming when she got off of Sully, she had been on a lead line. And afterward, I was too. I much look forward to regular lessons every Saturday at 10, now.

Yeah, that's the only thing that's bee going on lately... except Derrick is coming back to Riverview today! I can't wait to see him, I missed him so much. I gotta enjoy my last three weeks with him as much as I can, it's all we've got left.

Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: The City is at War - Cobra Starship

Long time no update.

Ahh, hello there Blogger. So sorry I haven't been around lately!

I've been out almost everyday, doing whatever with the guys... walking, watching movies, swimming and going to Magic Mountain, and being general teenagers. Everything seemed great until two nights ago, Monday night, when Derrick told me something I never wanted to hear. He's not staying, after summer is over... he had said he might be.

I won't lie, I feel heartbroken and devastated. I wanted him to stay, and go to RHS with me SO bad... and, now, that hope is just gone. My heart kind of stopped that night, and it's gonna take a while before it starts beating again. Meanwhile, things between Derrick and I are really rough. It's because I can't help but act so cold to him, after he told me he wasn't staying. I wanted that more than anything, right now. And, when I'm hurt like this, this is what I do... I curl up in a ball kind of, and just vent resentfulness to whoever did this to me. I know it's not Derrick's fault, he really did have to go back, to his brother and his family... but that doesn't change how upset I was, and still am. I cried non-stop that night... but then I talked to Daniel.

Daniel, Derrick's brother, told me that I had to try to be happy for Derrick. He said that he doesn't want to see me hurt, and that it was the hardest thing Derrick had ever done. So, I'm going to try to appreciate that, and put my own sour feelings behind me. I don't know how exactly I'm going to do that... but I have to try. It might be a little easier because Derrick isn't around right now. He's in Truro for his brother's birthday, which is today.

I really, really hope we can get through this. I don't want to lose him. And I think... no, I know, that we can get through another year. We will see our anniversary, and then our second. I love him, and that's all I need.

Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: So Far by ChapterFour (Local band. YouTube it.)

This sucks.

Well now, I haven't written in a few days. I'm afraid I don't have much to report today, either.

Two days ago, Thomas and his girlfriend Taylor were visiting New Brunswick to go to a beach in Cap-Pele, so we decided to go meet them there in the evening. So it was Derrick, Frankie, Taylor, Thomas and I, all just kinda hanging out there on the beach... none of us did much swimming though, for various reasons.

Someone had the great idea of burying Frankie in the sand (it was totally his idea, too.), so, we started, and then decided to make him a mer-person. So we did, and the tail, if I do say so myself, was pretty impressive. The whole thing was really.Seeing as how we were all very amateur sand-sculptors, it turned out well. Many laughs were had, and many a picture were taken, one of them being my new favorite picture ever. It's of the five of us, Frankie engulfed in sand. The picture, which I edited, is at the bottom of this post.

Also, it's 27 degrees outside, and NO ONE IS AROUND! All my friends aren't around right now... Derrick and Frankie are still sleeping, Melissa is at camp, Sarah is in Moncton, Josh is in Saint John and I think Ryan is working. I'm still not talking to Brett. Grrr, this stinks! It's prime swimming weather out there! Warm, sunny, and not too too humid either... it's a beautiful day, and I'm in here wasting away, writing in my blog and listening to Tool. So, I think I'm going to pull on my Converse and go force the boys out of bed... they'll thank me later.

That's me, Frankie and Derrick in the front, and Taylor and Thomas in the back. Yeah, we're pretty awesome. Since you probably can't read it, it says "And in twenty years... these will be the days we remember." and at the bottom it says, "I love you."

Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: Right in Two by Tool. That song is EPIC, man. Go listen to it. Like, right now. (link'd.)

"Hope and pray that you'll never need me, but rest assured I will not let you down."

Hello all you people out there in blogger-land!

I haven't gotten around to updating this the last few days, and that sucks... I guess not a lot has happened worth mentioning, besides Derrick coming back. You wouldn't believe how happy I was to see him at the bus station... now, lets see if I can remember the last few days.

Well, two days ago, Frankie, Derrick and I all went to see Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Again. Well, me and Frankie had seen it, but Derrick hadn't... and Frank and I liked it enough to see it again. Ted drove us there, which was nice. So that's what we did Monday night. Then yesterday, Ted, Frankie's older brother and my cousin, had the day off and offered to take me and the boys to Magic Mountain, because we all have passes... those things sure are worth it. So, we went in the afternoon and all was well. The last few days have been great, really, except for the ever-changing weather. It's still overcast and rainy, and horribly humid. It makes everything feel heavy and tired, it's horrible.

That reminds me. Today, I slept in until 1PM, which is bad... I hate oversleeping like that, but I keep staying up late... it's not a good habit, and I gotta get out of it. School starts in a little more than a month, and my sleeping schedule is all out of whack, and... wait.

SCHOOL STARTS IN A LITTLE MORE THAN A MONTH?!

Holy fuzz nuggets, Batman. Half the summer is gone! There are ten more days in July, and then all of August... and sometime during the first week of September, I'll have my first school day at Riverview high School, or RHS for short. I can't believe 9 out of 13 years of my primary education are already behind me... here I am, going into grade 9, the first year of high school... I don't feel like a high school student. I still feel like a kid.

Okay, enough. I sound like I'm forty or something. Derrick should be coming over soon... actually, he should have been here a few minutes ago. I wonder where he is... I'll call over.

Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: Citizen Soldier by 3 Doors Down

Boredom entries for the win?

It's mid-afternoon, no one is online to talk to, and it's drizzling outside. I'm terribly bored, so blogger, I turn to you.

I have no idea what I should write about, seeing as the most interesting thing that's happened yet today was me making rice for lunch and reading a Woman's Home Journal magazine. I wonder why my mom is even subscribed. She never reads magazines... and when she does, it's Soap Opera Digest that she buys at Super Store, anyway.

So, am I doomed to rot away in my room on this dreary summer afternoon? it appears so. normally, when I feel like this, I go for a walk. But I don't want to get caught in heavy rain if I do... blehh. This is the worst kind of weather. I'd rather it just downpour all day than stay like this. At least then, it's over when it's over. But this drags on for days, sometimes weeks at a time.

It reminds me of when I was in Mexico earlier this year. Oh right, I never explained that. Well, long story short, I went on a student exchange program with my school to stay with a family in Mexico City for two weeks, along with about 18 other kids from Riverview Middle and Riverview High. I didn't actually have that great a time, because of a few varying factors... but really, because I let Anna know something I shouldn't have, and it's something that near ruined the trip. At least I had the experience of seeing some ancient ruins, magnificent museums, and absorbing a bit of a third language.

The reason it makes me think of there is because it NEVER rains there! Every single say, for the two weeks I stayed, there wasn't a cloud in the sky! it was always sunny,hot, and clear. I mean, I went in late February/early March, and the weather was like the summer weather in Canada, except no rain. I think it's one of the parts I miss the most about it... that, and the food.

It's really kinda sad when you think about it. I went to have a great time, and make a "best friend for life". Anna, the girl who kept me... I'm pretty sure she hated me, or at least found me annoying. She treated me like I barely existed, and spoke in constant rapid Spanish to her friends, when she knew I couldn't understand and she was plenty fluent in English. The experience was not all I expected it to me... and I was the only one who felt that way. Everyone else had a wonderful time and made new friends and such... and I was kind of forgotten. Even when the Mexican students came to stay with us a few weeks later, I didn't get an exchange student.

But the worst of it all? The whole reason I didn't have a good time really, and that little bit of info I told Anna... I can't tell me parents how I feel and why. To them, it was just kind of like "Oh, well Anna and Alex just didn't mesh very well." That's true too, but the real reason, I have to hide. They don't know something about me yet, and I told Anna, and she freaked out, and... oh, it was just horrible. It was a bit of a wake-up call to how cruel people can be sometimes, and how afraid we are of what we don't understand...

Well, I think that's enough basking in painful memories.
And as a side note, I miss Derrick a lot. I want him back already...

Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: Careless Whisper by Seether

Being loved? Yeah, it can kinda suck sometimes.

Grrrr. I thought Derrick was going to be back today, but he's not. He's only coming back Saturday... I miss him.

The last two days, I've gone to the pool with my guy friends... cause the only two girl friends I have (Sarah and Melissa) are away. Mel is at cadet camp and Sarah is in Moncton with her dad... so it's just been me and a few of my favorite boys for a while. Yesterday it was Brett, Josh and me, and today, Ryan came with us too. There's nothing wrong with just hangin' with the guys once and a while... it's kind of bringing out a bit of my old tomboy personality. And that's kinda cool. Brett, my friend since first grade, says he noticed it too.

I'm a bit worried about Brett, actually, because I'm fairly sure he's not at ease with the feelings he has for me right now... feelings of far more than just friendship. It bothers me, because I don't want him to not get along with Derrick. He's my best friend and Derrick is my boyfriend, how can I deal with it if there's too much friction? I'm not about to leave Derrick because of Brett's leftover romance for me... so I might have to limit my contact with Brett instead. Jeeze, I'm losing friends left and right the last few weeks. This sucks.

Yours (regrettably) truly,
- Lexi

Music: Our Truth by Lacuna Coil (that song is an epic in musical form. Youtube it, or something.)

This is an entry title!

Three days pass, and I still have nothing of interest to write.

Well, that's not really true. I just didn't feel motivated enough to write the last two nights, I guess the enthusiasm of having my own little blog just kinda wore off. Oh well, I'll try to recall the last two days.

Sarah's been hanging around with me and my friends lately. Not that she isn't my friend, it's just, she can be a little awkward at times. I love her to bits, but... she's so melodramatic. She worries so much for what people think of her, and she's been made to think that her opinion is worth nothing, though she never hesitates to state it. She just assumes no one cares... so, sometimes, people don't really. It's almost heartbreaking. She is such a beautiful person, inside and out. I wish someone would tell her, you know, besides me.

Other than that, I guess things have been normal-ish... oh! Right! Thomas is here visiting. Things sure are different having him around. I guess I had forgotten the energy he has... like, his presence is very noticeable. It's impossible to exsplain, really, unless you've met Thomas yourself. So having him around is great, and I think it's made Frankie very happy. I mean, they were like PB and J when Frankie lived in Nova Scotia. It just wasn't quite right, having one without the other. So I'm sure he's happy having him around.

Also, Derrick left to go back to Truro tonight. Not permanently, just to visit his brother and his mom. He was pretty excited when I said goodbye to him at the bus station, I could tell. He misses his brother an awful lot... he didn't even seem like he was upset to be leaving too much, which is odd for him. But then again, he is coming back in a few days. I'm not sure how long he'll be staying there for yet, but he'll probably be back by Saturday or Sunday at the latest. I miss him already.

But then, it might be good that he's gone to visit them... not that I don't love having him here, and miss him when he's gone. I mean, this gives me a little while to spend some time alone. Since he's gotten here, I realized, I hadn't really gotten an evening to myself. I would be babysitting at home, or, most likely, be with him either at Kelli's or here, in my room. So, after we got back from the bus station, I went for a walk by myself to the swing like I love to do so much. It was nice unwinding a bit. I'll make a point to do so more often, after he comes back home.

On a completely different topic, I finally figured out how to use the external memory on my cell phone properly! Yay for micro SD cards! Yeah, there was something wrong with the internal memory of it, so it would only save like, 20 pictures at a time... much, much less than it should. It's a Samsung Slyde, a relatively new phone. I love it. So, I slipped my 4G Micro SD in it and now I can get the pictures and videos I take with it off and put them on my computer. Oh, how I love the convienience of modern technology.

Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: Right In Two by Tool/Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls

Reunited!

Well, today I found out that Thomas is coming back to visit! He's due here tomorrow, around 1:00. I can't wait to see him again! It'll be so great to have the four of us, the "fearsome foursome" as Kelli calls us, all together again. We're not sure yet how long he'll be staying here, but hopefully enough to catch up and maybe relive some old memories. Also on our side is the recent good, warm weather... great for swimming. I look forward very much to the next few days.

Also today, my family (mom, dad, Noah, Jill and Zach) and Kelli, Frankie, Derrick and I all went to Magic Mountain. Jill brought a few friends, and I spent the afternoon with the boys. It was funny, comparing the day today to the last time Derrick and I were there together... and how, when you think about it, if we hadn't gone that day, we wouldn't have been together today. It was a nice thought... Derrick seemed happy. We all did. Another good day behind us.

As for tonight, I think it's just gonna be me and the boys hanging out around here, at Kelli's... oh, yeah. I've hijacked Derrick's laptop to write this, because he's on the phone with his mom right now. Heh heh heh...

Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: Whatever Frankie's got playing... sounds like Kamelot.

Skittles + Pineapple Crush

Today was a very bland day, really, but a nice one.

I woke up at around 10, to the sound of my annoying cell phone alarm, and not my normal alarm clock. That's because in the other basement room, besides my bedroom, is undergoing renovations. It will eventually become our family room. My clock radio is in there, so my grandpa can listen to the radio while he works. So that means awaking to the sound of my cell phone going off on the opposite pillow for a while.

After finishing the cleaning of my room and finding something to eat, I called Derrick and Frankie and we wandered off to a local pool to spend the afternoon with our neighborhood friend, Josh. I also saw an old friend of mine, Carl, with a girl I knew from school, Keri-Ann, there. It was nice to see them and we all kind just hung out. After we were finished swimming, it was around 4, and we were hungry so we wandered to McDonald's. After that we kinda wandered home, to just chill out at my place and eat the remainder of the ice cream sandwiches in the fridge.

My parents went out for supper, but let Frankie and Derrick stay... so we made sandwiches (real ones, no ice cream involved) for supper. We watched MOD and some CSI... yay acronyms. When my parents came home we decided to go to the store, and Derrick found this Pineapple Crush soda he's been ranting and raving about since... a long time now. So he bought it and was happy, and I got Skittles and was happy. And that's just a happy little story right there.

When we got back, we talked paranormal stuff... like we usually do, cause we're a weird bunch of kids. They got home a little late tonight, and that was that. A simple enough day, but a happy one too.

Yeah... that's all I have to say. You can go now.
Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: You Found Me by The Fray

The start of it all.

Oh, well, isn't this awkward. I have created a blog, for me to list all my little personal misadventures in, and I have no idea how to start this story. Well, one would think I should start from the beginning... but I'm not exactly sure where that is, either. So I'll start with this summer, and the events leading up to this summer. (Wow, I lack creativity sometimes.)

Well, way back in June 08', my cousin and dear friend Frankie, who had lived in Nova Scotia for 5 years, moved back to New Brunswick. In the following August, two of his friends, Thomas and Derrick, came to visit him and check out New Brunswick. Thomas was a character I had heard endless stories about, with him being Frankie's best friend and all. But Derrick? Who the hell is Derrick? He seemed to just kind of be a tag-along, someone Frankie had talked to at school, but was really just a friend of Thom's. In any case, when they finally came to visit, I was super excited to meet them. And when I say them, I mean Thomas, because at the time I had no idea who Derrick really was.

I remember the first time that I ever actually saw either of them in person. They were sitting on the couch in my living room, waiting on me to come upstairs from my dungeon (bedroom). Upon walking into the room, I wasn't surprised. Neither of the boys were particularly good looking, and Thomas was exactly who I thought he'd be. We talked for a while, mostly just Frankie, Thom and I. Derrick was very quiet, hardly saying a word to me the entire time. but, then again, the "entire time" was only about 5 minutes. After that, I had to leave with my mom to go run some errands. So, that was the first encounter I had with my boyfriend-to-be.

The next time I had a chance to get to know both of them was when my aunt Kelli (Frankie's mother, my dad's sister) planned for me, Frankie, Derrick and Thomas all to go to a national park, to spend the day at a beach. Don't ask me what it was called, I don't remember how to spell nor pronounce it. It was a lot of fun, I won't go into detail about that right now. It's not tremendously important, everything that happened that day. Just that I was getting to know Thomas a little better, but Derrick was still very quiet. I remember asking Frankie if he didn't like me, but he simply said that Derrick was shy, that he was always like that around people he barely knew. All I could do was nod at that, because there wasn't really any way I could change that.

We planed a few other things to do, before the boys were shipped back to Nova Scotia, but the only other relevant one was going to a local water park for the day, called Magic Mountain. That, dear readers, is the day that I made a very bold move that would set off a near unpredictable chain of events that no one really saw coming.

So there we were, just splashing around, being teenagers and all... and by then, I had learned that both Thomas and Derrick had never been kissed. By the end of the day, I decided I was going to change that for Derrick. A risky move, I know, but I'm so glad I did now. It was nearing the end of our day, and just out of the blue, when Thomas and Frankie weren't looking, I just planted one right on his left cheek. I'll never forget the look on his face. He was so dazed, so startled. It was just one of those moments that will stay with me for the rest of my life.

After that fateful kiss, I just swam away. Much to my content, Derrick came to find me soon after and asked me simply, "Why did you run away?"
"I didn't run away." I replied.
"Yes you did." he said. I had totally run away, he was right. After that, he asked me why I had done that and all, to which I answered that I wasn't completely sure... just that I felt he deserved it. He smiled at me. That was the first time I had ever seen that sweet smile of his, and I think I just about fell in love with him right there. Yes, I can be romantic if I want to be. Sue me.

Eventually, of course, the boys had to go home. But I made a point to get Derrick's MSN, and I was so determined to get to know him better. My efforts would be rewarded.

Over the following months, I got to know Derrick very well, and he got to know me, too. We eventually became best friends, to a point where I would talk to him everyday until well into the night. During this time, I learned of his story, one that encircled heartbreak and loneliness, and a world that was like a living Hell for him. He told me about his parents splitting up, his brother's staying at a hospital being treated for anxiety, his stressful household, and his constant negative, sad mood. I was determined to help him now. But what could I do? I was a 13-year-old girl, a province away, who was trying to help someone she had only known a few months recover from ages of stress and sadness. In my eyes, there was only one thing that I could do, and I would do it to the very best of my ability: I would be his friend.

And I was. Everything seemed to be getting better for him, and eventually, sometime in late November, he confessed to me that he loved me. I told him that I loved him too, but that the distance would make it very hard for us to be together. I soon changed my tune about that, actually, and Derrick and I have been together since December 2nd... a relationship 7 months in the making now.

Eventually, I told Kelli of Derrick's troubles at home and she invited him to start spending weekends in New Brunswick with her and Frankie more often, about once a month. And, until the school year was over, he did. He was here for March break and some of Christmas break, and now, he's staying with Kelli and Frankie until the end of the summer. And us? Well, we couldn't be happier to finally be together, after going weeks at a time without seeing each other.

Well, now, that brings us to the real reason I've started this blog. That would be because my very favorite aunt Kelli, suggested that I keep a journal this summer. I asked her why, and her response was something like this:
"Are you kidding me? If I could go back in time, and tell myself to do one thing, it would be to keep a journal, or a diary, or something like that. I don't remember all the summers I spent as a teenager, but I really wish I did. And, think about it. You're both 14 now, you boyfriend is coming from another province to stay the summer, you're in love, and you're pretty much free! This is like Dawson's-f**king-Creek, man!"
So, she was right, of course. But, instead of keeping a journal or a diary, I've decided to blog instead. Why blog? Two reasons. One, because I don't like hand writing things all that much, really. And two, I think it'll keep me entertained longer.

Well, there you have it. My whole little story condensed, somewhat, into one blog entry. And this is just the tip of the iceberg, I have a WHOLE lot more to tell. So, stay tuned, cause maybe later I'll write something interesting.

Yours truly,
- Lexi

Music: New Divide by Linkin Park